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Game Reviews, News, Guides, and Humor


App Store Birds: A Diagram

February 25th, 2014 by

flappy bird tiny wings angry birds

All the data you need, and not a single number in sight.

[cinismoilustrado]

Review: Hoplite (iOS)

February 16th, 2014 by

hoplite magma fortress
Hoplite is a strategy/roguelike that seems simplistic at first sight, but quickly bares its fangs. Does it get too difficult too quickly, or is it worthwhile?

Video Games Made Into Romance Novels

February 14th, 2014 by
fierce moves
There’s a reason ‘shoryuken’ has both ‘Ryu’ and ‘Ken’ in it.

In celebration of Valentine’s Day, we though we’d share with you something we ran across a while back; something romantic for all you swoon-happy mongrels out there. Why don’t you kick back, grab a few chocolates out of that heart shaped box, and stuff them straight into your mouth-hole while you enjoy these classic video games reimagined as cheesy romance novel covers.

Punch-Out’s Little Mac is coming to Smash Bros.

February 13th, 2014 by

smashbros_littlemac

Today’s Nintendo Direct kicked off with a punch. It was like a kick-punch, though.

Little Mac, the undersized underdog from the Punch-Out series, was announced as a playable character in Super Smash Bros. for 3DS and Wii U.

For people like me who grew up with 007 373 5963 deeply ingrained into our very being, this is terrific news. Seeing as my friends would only play Super Smash Bros. Brawl with Assist Trophies turned off, this makes him pretty much all new for me.

Crap... don't let Anita Sarkeesian see this screen.

Crap. Whatever you do, don’t let Anita Sarkeesian see this screen.

For those of you keeping score at home, this brings the current playable character count to 23, still a far cry from Super Smash Bros. Brawl’s 35 selectable characters. More names will be announced, surely, but Mega Man versus Little Mac is kind of a dream come true for me.

“The size of the fight in the dog” was kind of my mantra growing up.

Even If You Dislike Dhalsim, You’ll Love This Tattoo

February 13th, 2014 by
dhalsim tattoo foot
Click the pic to appreciate in full-sized glory

Someone found a way to make Dhalsim a lot less annoying!

We don’t know who’s foot that is, or who inked the tattoo, but damn if this isn’t one of the coolest Street Fighter related artworks we have ever seen on someone’s leg.

Dhalsim tattoo is pretty darn slick, incorporates person’s appendage into the artwork [eventhubs]

The Legend Of Cross-Stitch: A Link To The Past

February 12th, 2014 by
zelda cross stitch
Click the image for the full monty

Here’s a riddle: What takes 9 months to make and is more precious than life itself? No, not a baby. C’mon, man.

The correct answer, of course, is this ridiculously fantastic cross-stitch of Hyrule from The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, arguably the series’ finest entry. This is the work of redditor tibtibs, who’s dedication to making awesome things is commendable.

It took me 9 months to complete it, but it’s finally done! [r/pics]

Just a few hours until Flappy Bird is no more.

February 9th, 2014 by

flappy_bird_buhbye

Likely inundated by his sudden rise from obscurity to the top of the App Charts and the subsequent fame that comes with it, Vietnamese Flappy Bird developer Dong Nguyen is doing the only thing he can to get his life back to normal.

Dong Nguyen stated on his Twitter account, @dongatory, that he’ll be removing it from the App Store in 22 hours. That was 19 hours ago. So by my math, that means you’ve got something like um… airspeed velocity… obviously Mario World… carry the remainder… Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pop… one… two… three. Yes, you have three hours left. Thanks, Mister Owl!

Flappy Bird currently brings in about $50,000 a day in ad revenue according to this interview from The Verge, but sports stars and lotto winners can tell you that mo’ money equals mo’ problems. There’s no telling how many family members have already hit him up for cash or how many reporters have reached out for an interview about this game whose reviews seem about on par with The Mountain Three Wolf Moon shirt over on Amazon.

Way to go, Internet. You made a guy rich and possibly break down.

If you, like me, have somehow managed to avoid the Flappy Bird phenomenon, now’s your last chance to do it.

Let’s see what all this fuss is about. And… download…

Review: Spell Quest – Grimm’s Journey (iOS/Android)

February 9th, 2014 by

spell_quest_title

When looking at Spell Quest – Grimm’s Journey, gamers will likely be divided into two primary groups: those who hate it because it’s basically Bookworm Adventures or those who love it because it’s basically Bookworm Adventures.

I’ve been saying for years that Bookworm Adventures would be a perfect fit for iPhone or iPad. That kind of gives away which grouping I fall into, doesn’t it?

PopCap had their chance. Now it’s time for the Bacon Bandits to shine.


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